Sample 1.
Before:
...we felt that we should start studying from the starting point of the study to develop further study on the boundary lubrication mechanism from the aspect of molecular behavior.
After:
...we felt we should begin the study by examining the molecular behavior involved in boundary lubrication.
Sample 2.
Before:
Title: Bone density evaluation of the warship crews using ultrasound method
Self-defense officials are robust and can think that their bones will be intensive.
However, the maritime self-defense officials are forced to live in a narrow warship, and we worried about their degradation of bone density so that their momentum fall.
Therefore we investigated bone density of the warship crews and the connection with living habits, what kinds of factors had an influence on bone density.
Furthermore, we reviewed everyday milk introjection, momentum, medical history of fractures, taking of nutrients adjuvant and coherence with BMI.
After:
Bone density evaluation of [sailors] using [ultrasonography]
[Soldiers and sailors] are robust and [may believe themselves indestructible.] However, [] maritime self-defense [crew members] are forced to live in [] narrow warship[s], and we worried about [the degradation of their bone density in such conditions and about the fractures that might occur as a result.]
Therefore we investigated [the] bone density of [] [sailors and the relationship between density and] living habits, [looking specifically for the factors that affect] bone density.
Furthermore, we reviewed everyday milk [consumption, exercise, fracture history, nutritional supplement habits, and body mass index (BMI).]
Sample 3.
Before:
What is Maziora
In the paint membrane the special pigment which is included, we form 5 layer system, from the surface surface 50% and remaining 50% reflects light at central layer. Per angle and the light which you see it does and is to be with expression of color changes, the dynamic color shift, furthermore pulls the forum where the car is beautiful and can stand.After:
Maziora™ is a polarized automotive paint that changes color depending on the angle from which it is viewed and on the angle of light falling on it. The paint membrane, which includes a special pigment, has five layers. Half of the color is reflected from the light reaching the upper layers, while the other half is reflected from the light at the center layer. The car appears illuminated in beautiful and dynamic color shifts.” (Maziora is a trademark of Japan Paint Co., Ltd.)